Why I don’t Plan on Quitting my Job to Have a Baby
It’s true, I’m pregnant! But don’t you worry — I have no intention of turning this into a Mommy Blog…
Now with baby on the way, I’m seeing my ups and downs as an entrepreneur through a whole new lens, one that is getting increasingly complicated.
My mom’s first piece of advice when she learned I was pregnant was, “Thicken that skin because you’re about to get judged.”
No lie, moms tend to get unwanted opinions almost immediately and from all angles. I was mentally prepared for chatter on raising the baby, things I “must buy” and general new mommy advice about sleeping patterns, breastfeeding, doctors etc. Mostly everything I’ve encountered has come from a loving place of general helpfulness (no matter how backwards I think the opinions may be).
And honestly I’ve mostly welcomed it! Because, shit, this is all new to me. I’m even surprising myself with how laid back and open-minded I’ve been throughout my pregnancy.
What I wasn’t mentally prepared for was the one reoccurring question that was targeted directly at ME: “So, are you going to quit working once baby comes?“
It’s by far the question I get asked THE MOST, which kind of takes me aback. I’ve wondered why this, out of all things, is the question people ask me again and again.
– Is it because I’m generally a very career-focused individual?
– It is because I’m married and have the perceived potential of living on my husband’s income?
– Or simply, do all future mamas deal with this same fork-in-the-road question?
I’m not necessarily offended or hurt by the question (though it does feel a little 50’s housewife). But it does confuse me. Sure, being a stay-at-home mom is an option and a great one, but it’s just something I’ve never realistically considered or envisioned for myself.
I’ve planned for this.
Believe it or not, when I got into real estate several years ago, my husband and I discussed how great a career path it is going to be when we eventually have kids. So here we are a few years down the road from that discussion, pregnant with our first babe, and I believe that thought still stands true.
I’m not about to abandon my career when one of the reasons I chose it was for the idea that it could work well with a chaotic life of a family.
One of the things I value most about being an entrepreneur is the flexible lifestyle away from a 9-5 office job. This is all part of the plan, people!
My family depends on me.
To be frank, quitting my career to be a stay-at-home mom isn’t a realistic option financially. I bring in an equal portion of the income to our household, and chopping that in half isn’t really a challenge we’re ready to learn how to live with.
On top of that, we have some pretty heavy financial goals ahead of us that we’ve already put in years of preparation towards. If you recall, we’re working through some large student loans. (<— click here to read about it!!)
As I’ve learned, getting my ass to work seems to be the best thing to combat that big pile of debt.
We also just bought a house and oh of course, the baby, duh. Seems like life is just getting increasingly more expensive.
I really like my career and I don’t want to quit!
The question of my career status has never come in the phrase of: “How are you going to juggle working?” It’s always, “Are you going to quit?” as if quitting is the Standard / Status Quo and my choice to stay working is going against the grain.
But is it? I think it would be quite out of character for me to quit my career, something I find my identity so wrapped into.
I’ve hustled over the past few years to succeed as a real estate agent & I value what my career does for my self worth and self esteem. Now is not the time to throw in the towel, girl I’m just getting started!
Maybe my perspective will change once I meet my sweet little babe in September, and I’m totally open to that. I’m not naive. I know my day-to-day is about to drastically change as it comes to work-life balance. But at this point in my very first pregnancy, it seems a little strange that I would already have hashed out the master plan to quit my career in the upcoming months. Mind you, a career as an entrepreneur that I’ve built and grown and paid some really exhausting dues for.
For some, a new baby can sound like a dream opportunity for those on an uninspired career trajectory. I tooootally get it. If that were me, I would probably be excited at the opportunity to reset and refocus, too.
I also know women who had every intention of going back to work and then once the baby arrived, they had a come-to-Jesus moment while holding their newborn that being a stay-at-home mama is sooo much more important than anything going on at the office. It’s a game-time decision.
But to me in this moment, I’m so passionate about my work and excited for the future. The thought of abandoning my career right now leaves me with an instinctual, gut-wrenching sadness; the feeling of unfulfilled potential is hard to ignore.
While I PINKY SWEAR this will not become a typical Mommy Blog, I gotta say that I am so excited to share how I incorporate the new babe into my everyday life as a real estate agent and business owner. We’ve got quite an adventure ahead of us! And naturally, I already have a whole slew of content for once the baby comes that will merge our new lives with my current business.