Collaboration over Competition: Dealing with Conflicting Mindsets

Collaboration over competition

It’s time to have a really honest conversation, and this one is going to be hard.

I’ve experienced both the light side & the dark side of blogging. Of self promotion. Of publicly building a business.

And it baffles me that some people Just. Don’t. Get. It.

As we navigate this public Internet world, there really are no rules. You can post as often or as little as you want. You can talk about whatever you want. On your own page, your word is yours.

But then there are other channels that other people own. Facebook Groups, Publications etc. where moderators are rulers of the content.

And yall, it just happened. I JUST GOT MUTED.

It’s the strangest feeling to know that I was singled out & muted in a Facebook community I was once very active in. Like a sign on the door that says “you are not welcome here.” Of course, none of the members of this group had a say or even knowledge this happened. No one “voted me off the island” or anything. This was the moderator’s choice.

I will say that at first I was hurt and offended. I was all, “What right does she have?! She does not know me and doesn’t get to NOT like me!!

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But then I calmed down.

I said, Kristi, she does have the right. It’s her group.

This isn’t the first time I didn’t mesh well with someone, & it certainly won’t be the last.

But this post isn’t about me overcoming some “failure” to fit in. Nope. Maybe that’s another post.

This one is about her.

This is about her choice to mute, to stop the conversation, and to burn a bridge.

It’s about a choice to feel threatened.

It’s her loss, honestly. And I’m sad she chose to go that route.

I’m sad when people choose to look at others in similar fields as competition instead of opportunities for growth. I see this happen ALL. THE. TIME. And that’s how I’m certain this won’t be the last time I see it happen to me.

Abundance vs Scarcity Mindset

As I said before, there are really no rules, so no one has to play nice. They can do whatever they want.

But it’s a matter of mindset, isn’t it? Seeing everyone as a threat means there is not enough to go around. If I get that opportunity, you don’t. If I get that dollar, you don’t.

And that’s fucking bullshit. I usually would sensor that, but I can’t even.

Don’t take this Scarcity Mindset approach. Just, don’t. Realize that when we have an abundance mindset, we help each other grow. FASTER.

Not only are there PLENTY of opportunities, plenty of people to reach, and plenty of ways to make a buck… but there are also plenty of ways to work together.

threatened by the competition

Collaboration Over Competition

Now let’s talk about Shop Buzzed for a sec.

As some of you know, I co-founded a collaborative event called Shop Buzzed where we invite local brands to party alongside our brands, and we set up shop in local bars around Chicago. Simply put, it’s a sh*t ton of fun. Our tagline is Collaboration over Competition — also the title of this post.

I was at a Shop Buzzed event and I was telling another vendor about a big opportunity we had coming up. Her response: “Man, I am so jealous of you guys.”

I almost screamed at her!! I said, “GIRL! This is Shop Buzzed! My opportunity is YOUR opportunity! If you want in, let’s do it! Figure out how we can collab!”

Collaboration over Competition with Abundance Mindset

I think many instinctively see others as competitors. And what do they do? Try to mute them because let’s face it, the loudest tends to win.

We don’t have to censor each other. Listen. See what your competitor is offering that is different from you. Then be creative. COLLABORATE.

Collaboration over Competition is not an “easier said than done” statement — Shop Buzzed is a perfect example of this. Collaborations are easy… and finding good, smart, genuine people to collaborate with is also not as hard as it sounds.

You just have to choose to think abundantly.

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